A Very Merry Pirate Christmas
by Angel's Star
Summary: All Elizabeth wanted was a nice, quite Christmas evening with Will, but what she got was a lot more than she barganed for.


A/N: So I decided I needed a new Christmas story that was in my category of interest, so here it is! Merry Christmas you guys! Here's my present to you.

Disclaimer: I don't own Pirates.

_A Very Merry Pirate Christmas_

"Hold open th' top! Don't mess up 'er hair!" The voice bounced with the Irish accent the speaker held and her curly, red hair bounced just as much out from underneath her bonnet. She and one other woman, a brunette, held the scarlet dress over Elizabeth Swann's head and carefully let it down, making sure not to upset any of the woman's curls. Elizabeth pulled it down over her head and slipped her arms in it as the dress fell gracefully on her. The two maids quickly began smoothing out any wrinkles that had managed to work their way into the fabric during the repetitive process as Elizabeth smiled to herself at the way it fit.

Just then, there was a knock on the door and the muffled voice of her father. "Elizabeth, are you ready?"

Having quite forgotten that she should be in a rush, she hastily grabbed her shoes from the corner and began pulling them on. "Almost. Is Will here yet?"

"Not yet, I'm afraid," he replied, sounding a bit impatient. "Do hurry, Elizabeth."

She straightened, wiggled her feet a bit inside her stiff shoes while the maids quickly made the final adjustments to her hair, placing a curl here or there that had fallen out of place. As soon as they were reasonably through, Elizabeth made hastily for the door with the two maids trailing behind her, whispering words of good luck and encouragement. With a smile, she left the two upstairs to giggle over the goings on of the evening.

As Elizabeth descended the staircase, she glanced at the front door, fully expecting to see Will waiting for her, but felt a tinge of pain prick her heart at his absence. If anyone was late, it was she and he should have already been there. Stepping off the stairs, she entered the drawing room to the right and seated herself comfortably in a chair so as to appear like she had been ready and waiting for a long time in advance. Her eyes meandered around the room as she trained her ears to the door, but there was no knock. After a few minutes waiting, she sighed and glanced down at the armrest of the chair and scratched at a speck of dirt, letting her mind wander off to how wonderfully spent this Christmas evening would certainly be. There would be a lovely, quite dinner, just Will and her, then they would open a few presents and sit by the fire contentedly.

_Just us_… She smiled, relishing the words as the turned and tumbled over and over in her mind. Just the two of them on this special evening.

A knock on the door interrupted her thoughts and she jumped from the sudden noise, though she had been expecting it. She peered around the edge of her chair and watched the front door, listened impatiently as the butler strode up to it. He seemed to be taking his precious time about getting there. For an instant, she considered springing up and opening the door herself, but remained seated and watched.

The man finally reached the door and opened it and greeted in the same monotonous tone that he always used, no matter the occasion, "May I help you?"

Elizabeth could not make out the reply, but grinned excitedly. Will was finally here! She waited for the butler to let him in, but instead he stepped back--much faster that she had ever witnessed him moving--looking horror stricken and holding a bottle filled with brown liquid. She furrowed her brows, but her confusion was somewhat staved by the sight of a man with dreadlocks wearing a grey tri-corn hat and matching overcoat.

Elizabeth leapt to her feet, gathered up her skirts, and scurried to the door as fast as her stiff shoes would allow. "Jack, what are you doing here?"

"Ah, 'Lizbeth!" He greeted, magically producing another bottle of rum from his coat pocket. "We heard you was havin' a party."

"Wait, what-" she began, but Jack ambled off and in his place the crew of the Black Pearl crowded in as one. They all greeted her in some fashion or another, every one of them leaving her asking questions that had yet to be answered.

"Looks like it's got a lot o' things that are worth somethin'," Ragetti mumbled to his friend as they entered, looking somewhat awe struck at only the entrance hall.

"Aye, sure does," Pintel agreed, tearing his eyes away from the chandelier to something his buddy pointed out.

Elizabeth opened her mouth to protest, but Barbossa stepped in and spoke first, "Mighty fine of ye ta have us, Ms. Swann."

"But I-" she started, but he walked on, not paying her anymore mind. Her eyes scanned frantically over the pirates who had already entered her house and the yet minor damage that had already been done. She searched her mind for a way to get them out without appearing rude, but no ideas came. Hoping to see Will standing in the door, she whirled around and, much to her shock, was greeted by none other than Tia Dalma and Davy Jones. It took her several seconds to regain her composure before stuttering, "Davy Jones? What-what are you doing here?"

The look in his eyes told her she should not have asked, but he answered grudgingly regardless. "My one day on land and I'm forced ta spend it here." And with that, he brushed past her, muttering random curses as he went.

"He'll be good," Tia reassured, smiling warmly at her hostess as she strode into the house. "'Ey! Don' try ta turn 'im into yer undead slave!"

Looking more desperate than before, she turned her back on the scene and found herself looking at Norrington. He was bedecked in his Royal Navy uniform, as if just having got here without time to change, and held his hands behind him. He smiled somewhat stiffly, as if trying not to laugh at a joke, and nodded to something behind her. "You might want to keep a close eye on your valuables."

Elizabeth turned to see Ragetti none too discretely slipping a doorknob into his pocket as Pintel came from the drawing room with a book carelessly shoved down the front of his shirt. Chuckling, Norrington walked on into the house where he promptly had his wig stolen by Jack the monkey. Elizabeth watched the man lose his composure and run after the monkey, shouting at it to give him his wig back immediately as the poor creature ran to Barbossa.

"Ms. Turner," came a very formal greeting from behind her and she turned to see Cutlet Beckett himself, much to her already great surprise.

"Beckett?" She asked, as if not sure whether it was really he who was standing there or not. "What are you doing here?"

"Dragged along, actually," he said stiffly, not disguising the fact that he was not pleased to be there as he entered the house without another word. Behind him, and much to Elizabeth's relief, stood Will, looking somewhat ashamed as if this whole mess was his fault. For a moment, she was not sure whether to throw herself in his arms and let him comfort her, or to squeeze an explanation for all this out of him.

"Will, what are they all doing here?" She asked, choosing the latter.

"Funny story, actually," he began, laughing nervously, but trying to lighten the mood. "I was on my way here when I saw that the Black Pearl had made berth so I went to go see what it was all about. When I got there, I saw Beckett and Norrington arguing with Jack and his crew over docking rights or something of that kind. Jack saw me and asked where I was going and so I told him. Turns out, he and his crew were coming here anyway to surprise us."

"Well they sure did," Elizabeth grumbled, shutting the door after him as he entered. "But that doesn't explain why Tia and Davy are here."

"Apparently they picked them up on their way here, though I don't believe it was Jack's first choice," Will replied, attempting a pitiful smile in hopes of cheering her up.

"How do I get rid of them?" She asked, not quite as upset from the sweet attempts Will was making at having a good evening.

Suddenly there was a loud crash behind her and the room went somewhat quite for a few seconds as the pirates surveyed the damage before resuming whatever they had been doing. Elizabeth looked back over her shoulder to see Ragetti looking down at a broken vase. He looked up and saw her watching him and attempted his best smile. "Sorry 'bout that."

"I've already tried to get rid of them," Will said in answer to her question, trying to keep her from getting too upset. "Just try to make the best of it. We'll spend tomorrow evening together. I promise."

Elizabeth nodded to herself and glanced off at a random floor tile. Will leaned forward and kissed her cheek, but the simple action did not go unnoticed.

"William, if yer wantin' _that_, there's prob'ly room upstairs," Jack suggested, trying to be helpful in his own way but only succeeding at getting glared at.

"You've got a dirty mind," Elizabeth stated none too gently.

"Pirate," the man replied with a grin. "Now if you'll excuse me, I'm off to try to find that redhead that ran away a while ago."

He began walking away and Elizabeth's eyes widened as what he meant dawned on her. Images of her poor, frightened maid getting trapped by any pirate, much less Jack, flashed through her head. Thinking quickly, she grabbed Jack by the arm, pulled him back, and hollered, "Who's ready to eat?"

The pirates looked up from whatever they happened to be doing and a collective shout filled the room. The group rushed from the room like a wave towards the dinning room, hooting and hollering the whole time while Beckett, Norrington, Tia Dalma, and Davy Jones walked, or limped, in Davy's case, like somewhat civilized creatures. Elizabeth and Will followed quickly, not taking time to survey the damage that had been dealt to the room.

They arrived in the dinning room to see the pirates scattered haphazardly around the room with no rhyme nor reason to their gathering. Some stood here, others sat there. Elizabeth noticed a few eyeing the silverware and she figured they were wondering if it was worth stealing. Just then the chef, who had only thought two people were to be dinning that night, barged in when he heard the racket and, Elizabeth thought with a giggle, could have passed out right then and there. When he recovered from the shock enough to walk, he hurried to Elizabeth and demanded to know what was going on.

"They're just a few friends who…dropped by," she explained quietly, glancing over her shoulder at two pirates who were gulping down their rum faster than she thought humanly possible.

"But," he began, eyeing the rambunctious crowd warily, "they're _pirates_."

She nodded, allowing how she already knew that. "Just prepare more of what you had ready for Will and I and if there's not enough, make something else."

The chef nodded exasperatedly and hurried back to the kitchen. Elizabeth was almost positive he would have quit his job right there and walked out on them, but was very grateful he did not. Soon, she could hear muffled shouts and protests from the other cooks who had been given the rest of the day off, but those were soon quenched and the cooking began.

How Elizabeth managed to keep so many hungry pirates semi calm for so long, she never knew, but was the most thankful that day than she had ever been because they mostly cooperated. Several times, she though riots would break out, but dismissed the thought as being silly because they were her friends and surely would not do something like that in her house. Hopefully. But as they waited for their food to be served, her feelings of frustration and irritation over their unexpected visit soon began to fade as she enjoyed herself. Being with her friends on Christmas seemed to make the evening just as special, if not more so, than if it had just been her and Will.

But soon, the tender moment was broken at the sight of food and a loud cheer erupted from the group of pirates. The chef and his cooks began handing out the plates randomly, not paying attention to who got what dish.

Mere seconds after he had received his food, Davy looked down at his plate in disgust and then up at the chef. "Do you fear death?"

The chef furrowed his brows in confusion, not quite sure he had understood the question. "Beg pardon?"

"You heard me!" Davy shouted, standing up and knocking his chair over in one swift movement. "How dare you serve me _fish?_"

The chef had no idea what was going on, but with something like Davy yelling at him, he ran regardless. Davy threw his chair through the window behind him and began hobbling as fast as he could around the table. The chef made a beeline for the kitchen with Davy close behind and soon several shouts and screams were heard. Pots crashed and clanged recklessly as the cooks tried to escape the wrath of the ruler of the seas.

All the pirates at the table sat quietly, none dared to laugh. Not yet. They sat listening intently to the unseen battle that raged on behind closed doors for several minutes.

"I'm puttin' my money on Davy Jones," Jack stated randomly with a glance around the table, hoping to strike up a bet with some unfortunate fellow who had no idea of Davy's capabilities. Too bad for Jack, everyone present at the table knew what the creature could do and even if one did not, they would know it would be wise to bet on Davy just by looking at him.

"Ye'd be a fool not to," Barbossa surmised, crossing his arms and leaning back in his chair comfortably.

Finally there was a great shout and then silence. Erie silence that only follows the end of a battle when the victors are searching for survivors, which is what everyone figured the ruler of the seas was doing. Finally, after several seconds of that agonizing silence, Davy emerged from the kitchen, looking all the better for what torture he had wreaked upon the chef and the other cooks.

"What did ye do t' dem?" Tia asked, an eyebrow raised as Davy took his seat once again and replaced his old plate of food with a new one.

He smirked to himself as if remembering an old joke. "Lets just say he won't be cookin' any more fish."

Elizabeth's eyes widened in horror. "You killed him?"

"No," Davy stated simply, not even looking up. "I said he won't be cookin' anymore fish."

Deciding to leave it at that and not bring his wrath upon her, Elizabeth did not ask any more questions but made a mental note to ask the chef what all had happened.

The conversation picked back up as if there had not been a pause and soon the meal was lively and happy once again. Some speculation over what all happened in the kitchen made its rounds, but that was soon forgotten and the pirates moved onto other subjects of interest such as rum, Tortuga, their ships, and where the most trade ships sailed.

Just as the meal was drawing to a close, Elizabeth decided she had something she needed to say. Clearing her throat, she stood and held her glass of wine in one hand and began, "I'd like to say thank you all for coming here today and making this a very special Christmas. I must admit I wasn't exactly thrilled at first and quite surprised. I had only planned on having Will here tonight, but I've discovered something today and that is that Christmas is meant to be shared and spent with friends and family, which is what you all are. My friends. So thank you all once again for coming and sharing this day with me. And now, a toast!"

The pirates grabbed up their bottles of rum while those who were more refined lifted their wine glasses.

"To friendship," Elizabeth stated, raised her glass as the pirates voiced their agreement and lifted their bottles of rum. The group all took a collective drink, some longer than others, and began their conversations once again.

Elizabeth seated herself once again and smiled warmly at the group. No matter how crusty, dirty, and drunk they were, they were still her friends and she was truly glad for them to be there with her, even though it was not just Will and her as she had originally planned. It was just as she was thinking this when Jack broke the happy moment.

"So, 'Lizbeth, since this is Christmas an' all, I'm sure you've got us all presents," he stated with a grin. "'Ow 'bout we open 'em now?"

Elizabeth's eyes widened and her mind began working overtime once again.

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A/N: I guess this is a bit shorter than my other stuff, but I hope everybody enjoyed it. It's my twentieth story! Yay! Anyway, Merry Christmas and a happy New Year!


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